“As we say down at the post-office: Here’s to looking up your address.” Cliff Clavin, Cheers
“You haven’t lived until you’ve seen Bonanza dubbed into french-canadian.” Cliff Clavin, Cheers
“Once the trust goes out of a relationship it’s really no fun lying to them anymore.” Norm Peterson, Cheers
“I don’t want to control people’s lives. If they did things right I wouldn’t have to!” Coach, Coach
(funny chinese fortunes, from Newsradio)
- “Envy not, that which need not be possessed”
- “Mighty oaks, from acorn, grow”
- “Good fortune happy lucky big time for you and family”
“Show me a woman who isn’t jealous of another woman and I’ll show you a man.” Bill McNeil, Newsradio
(J) “Don’t do that.”
(P) “Why not?”
(J) “Because,
I’m not ovulating yet.”
(P) “.. Well I am!” Jamie &
Paul, Mad About You
“Justice is incidental to law and order.” -J. Edgar Hoover-
“My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.” -Benjamin Disraeli-
“A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there’s no question about it.” -George W. Bush-
“Any man who wants to be president is either an egomaniac or crazy.” -Dwight Eisenhower-
“Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, its just the opposite.” -John Kenneth Galbraith-
“There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.” -Henry Kissinger-
“By definition, as a Prime Minister I cannot be a liar.” -Silvio Berlusconi-
“When you have an efficient government, you have a dictatorship.” -Harry S. Truman-
“Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.” -Margaret Thatcher
“If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” -Abraham Lincoln-
“We thank God that our ennemies are idiots.” -Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
“I am an environmentalist .. I am for clean air.” -Ronald Reagan-
“I am the Jesus Christ of politics. I am a patient victim, I sacrifice myself for everyone.” -Silvio Berlusconi-
“The trouble with free elections is, you never know who is going to win.” Leonid Brezhnez
“Well I’m not a nuclear psychiatrist but I think it’s bunk.” Luther van Damme, Coach
-Work is not about fun, its about.. work. It’s about seeing how
much crap you can take from your boss.. then some more. Listen to me,
only quitters quit.
-So, can I get a job? Red & Eric Foreman,
That 70s Show
“How can men use sex to get what they want?! Sex is what we want!” Frasier Crane, Frasier
“The Gods too are fond of a joke.” -Aristotle-
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.”
“We drink [to] one another’s health and spoil our own.” -Jerome K. Jerome-
“Be careful about reading health books. You might die of a misprint.” -Mark Twain-
“I’m not vulnerable, I’m slightly receptive.” Frasier Crane, Frasier
“Letter carriers do it on foot.” Cliff Clavin, Cheers
“If you chicks needed a little less booze to go from maybe to yes we’d be a lot more alert when the moment of truth arrives.” Bulldog Brisco, Frasier
“Ass freezehole!”
“I have a great mind to believe in Christianity for the mere pleasure of fancying I may be damned.” -Lord Byron-
(kid) -“I want my mommy!”
(Al) -“Yeah, so does your dad’s
brother.” Al Bundy, Married with Children
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